The Abundant Nest

Coping With an Empty Nest: Seven Tips for Parents Whose Children Have Distanced Themselves

A PURPOSEFUL LIFELIVE WITH GRATITUDE

Jane Victoria Hide

woman sitting on ground holding bouquet of tulips
woman sitting on ground holding bouquet of tulips

Hi there, fellow empty nesters! If you're finding yourself in the bewildering situation of having kids who've decided to keep their distance, you're not alone. It's tough, but hey, we've got each other, right? So, let's tackle this head-on and discover:

What you can do when your adult child distances themselves.

1. Respect Their Space

As hard as it may be, respecting your children's boundaries is crucial. Give them the space they need without smothering. Try to keep family traditions alive. Your child may simply be trying to discover who they are without your input. They may still want to be involved in family traditions.

2. Focus on Self-Care

It's easy to get caught up in worrying about our kids, but don't forget about yourself. Take time for self-care, whether it's a bubble bath, a walk in nature, or pursuing a hobby. I know it’s hard to work on us. Somehow it feel’s selfish doesn’t it. But when your young adult sees you caring for yourself, it will encourage them to do the same, and that is something that we want as mothers, right?

3. Seek Support

Don't go through this alone. Reach out to friends, family, or a therapist who can offer a listening ear and support. You are not the only parent whose child has or ever will do this. It happens for a number of reasons. Seek guidance if you are struggling with it. You could also try journaling. Putting pen to paper and releasing our thoughts and emotions allows us to look at the situation from different perspective. Read this BLOG POST to Discover Reasons to Embrace Journaling.

4. Reflect, but Don't Dwell

It's natural to wonder where things went wrong, but don't dwell on the past. Don’t put all the blame on yourself. Instead, reflect on what you can learn from the situation and how you can grow from it. Read this BLOG POST to learn some more tips that may help.

5. Stay Connected

While your children may be distant, don't let that stop you from staying connected. Send a text, make a call, or send a letter just to let them know you're thinking of them. You could send a care package. It’s important to remember though that you are attempting communication because you want to. Don’t get disheartened if you don't get a response. Gauge the situation and keep trying.

6. Find Purpose

Rediscover your passions and interests outside of being a parent. Whether it's volunteering, taking up a new hobby, or pursuing a career change, finding purpose outside of parenting can be incredibly fulfilling. It’s hard to move on from our role as mother, but it’s crucial for our future happiness. And you never know, it may be an interesting inlet for your adult child to come back to and discover what you have been doing. Use our Guide to an Intentional Life.

7. Stay Positive

It's easy to fall into negativity, but try to stay positive. Focus on the good in your life and the things you're grateful for, no matter how small. Practising daily gratitude will help you to move through the tough times. Sometimes we get caught up in the big things and forget that the small things can often help us get through. Take a walk in nature, listen to the birds and feel the sun on your face. Take it day by day and stay positive. It will help in the long run.

Remember, this journey may be tough, but you're tougher. And hey, who knows? Maybe with time, those distant kids will come back around. Until then, let's support each other through this wild ride of empty nesting and enjoy our time on this planet. We've got this!

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Love and Support

Jane

The Abundant Nest Logo with Jane's Face
The Abundant Nest Logo with Jane's Face